So many of us — especially the sensitive ones, the helpers, the healers — learn early on that our needs might inconvenience someone. Or disappoint them. Or take something away.
So we get good — really good — at the micro-contortions.
If you’re reading this, you probably know it all too well…
Maybe you hold your breath when you actually need to speak up.
Or soften your voice because someone else’s emotions feel bigger or more important.
Or downplay your disappointment so you don’t “make a scene.”
Or skip out on your own rest so someone else can be comfortable.
Or maybe it’s that age-old contortion of not taking up space at the table, in the room, in the conversation — just in case it shifts something for someone, especially in a negative way.
We twist, tuck, fold, and squeeze ourselves into shapes we think are more lovable. More convenient. More acceptable.
We become the human equivalent of sleeping on one tiny sliver of a giant bed.

The contortions can be huge, or incredibly subtle, undetectable at times, and yet they can have a huge impact in how we walk in the world. And it’s not that we’re weak, or unimportant, or don’t belong, or aren’t enough, it’s because we learned that taking up space can have consequences.

Being human can so damn awkward... Have you ever tried to play it cool and completely failed?Or...